Saturday, 30 December 2023

2023: A Memoir

Another December is on its way out, and along with it another year. T’is the season to recount, introspect, evaluate, and then of course, to form resolutions for the next year. For starters, I thought I did this last year too, and realized just now, that my last blog was in December 2021. Since I’m a glass half-full person, I’ll take this to mean that 2 years flew by, and like a great man once said “Time flies when you’re having fun”.

While I’m not going to recount 2022 in the same level of detail as 2023, I had a good year, and here are the highlights. I started it by moving in with my fiancĂ© into a bigger suburban apartment close to the water, took various vacations/staycations with each other’s friends, got married to the love of my life, now wife: Nimisha, honeymooned in Hawaii, stepped up professionally and became important (to an extent) to my team/org. Our families couldn’t be happier, now that we are married and have the signoff from the heavens! I count myself extremely lucky to have my amazing family beside me, and to have found Nimisha, whose family has been nothing but amazing. We hiked quite a bit, as residents of the Pacific Northwest (PNW), and most memorably, hiked to Hidden Lake in the North Cascades, which is on my all-time list of hikes that will reward you with the most breathtaking views at the top. 
Nimisha and I set out on what we thought will be a long journey – house hunting, and it turned out to be a relatively short one. We moved into it in October 2022, and spent the latter part of the year making it a home for us – a place we love to retreat to, and get energy from. Finally, we had an amazing holiday season by hosting many of our closest friends for Thanksgiving at our new home, and Christmas at our friends’ home (almost neighbors, really). We hit the city and ushered in the new year alongside friends, and fireworks. 

Right! Back (or forward) to this year… 

If I had to christen this past year with a title, it would be the year of travel and experience. My work was growing in scope, but I had the luxury of working from home, so long as I delivered results. 

January started with hope, excitement, and we were planning for a trip to Banff, Canada later in the year by getting the immigration formalities in place ahead of time. While that happened in the background, I was always very aware that Nimisha had never been to my favorite National Park, Yosemite. It was time we fixed that, and we did. We went to my best friend’s place in the bay area for over a week, worked from there during the week, while checking San Francisco out. One weekend, we made a trip to the vineyards at Napa, and the following weekend to the famed YNP. It was winter wonderland at Yosemite, and we camped at Curry Village for a night too. I remember this was also when companies started cutting to adjust for the over-hiring that they did during the pandemic, and the economy not meeting the bar. Microsoft, and Amazon announced huge cuts, and many colleagues, friends of ours got impacted. It was a stressful week for Nimisha (then Microsoft – not anymore), and me that week, and the wine (napa) and nature (YNP) really helped, not to mention the company of friends. We were lucky enough to keep our jobs. 

They say turmoil brings people closer, and that was true with a few friends around me; and I learned some things about their characters, how they deal with adversity. I was truly impressed, and inspired by the way some bounced back from layoff impacts, and understood those that changed course altogether, using it as a trigger to make the change that they perhaps always wanted to bring about. 

We had to travel to India, to get Nimisha’s visa renewed (among other things), so that we could safely travel to Canada later in the year (more on that later). We didn’t take PTO from work, and worked from India. This trip was 5 weeks long, and did not feel like a vacation, since we were working, sleeping, and waking up at odd times to be able to contribute at our full -time jobs back home in the US. [Yes, I can now say back home for both countries, both homes]. That being said, we did spend a lot of actual time in our newly acquired homes, with our newly acquired families. We got to know our in-laws, and our closest family better, and they got to know us as well. I played cute games with Nim’s grandmother, and made memories. My sister introduced me to the boy she has chosen for herself, and we met and spoke to them together for dinner/beer, and the memory of my sister blushing, and gleefully talking that extra bit to mask the blushing is etched in my brain, or maybe my heart. He’s a really nice guy, and I wish them the best. Among other highlights, we took our families out for food in 3 batches and celebrated us buying our home Batch 1: My parents, my sister, and her parents. Batch 2: My in-laws, and my MIL’s sister’s family. Batch 3: My parents, my sister, and my dad’s brother’s family. They were proud and happy. Another core memory. 

Come April, we started hiking while the snow was still around, and we kept at it. Every other week, you’d find us in the mountains. For me, this would make for good preparation for my impending backpacking trip to Havasupai in the end of May. We chased sunsets (clichĂ©, I know), and summits, however small, ran and played in parks in Seattle, made new friends, and spent more time with friends we liked (not to mention their dogs). We also found a Kannada Community in Seattle (Kannada Sangha), and we attended a couple of events they hosted. We dressed traditional, ate south Indian food on banana leaves, and it felt good.

 Soon enough, it was our first wedding anniversary! We went to wine and dine at a fancy Italian restaurant in Seattle, and then drove to a beachside hotel in Newport, OR, and spent 2 days on the beach. It was beautiful; Nimisha had planned some surprises along the way, and I was surprised. If you find the right person for you, I highly recommend marriage. That’s what I think, and feel. 

Havasupai: This is a story in itself, and it started in 2019 – before I even knew Nimisha. It was a lottery-based application to one of the most sought-after campgrounds nestled away in a protected desert, 12 long miles into it. The campgrounds provide access to waterfalls, tidal pools, etc., formed by a river that is a shade of blue that I cannot describe with words. Luckily, we have Google, and I know you do too. Magical! I was eager to do this strenuous backpacking adventure, and then the pandemic hit. The tickets, booked in 2019 (for 2020), finally became active in 2022. As much as I’d have wanted to do this with my partner, Nimisha encouraged me to not let go of this opportunity, and I set out on this adventure without her. It was the first time I was backpacking, and I went with 2 friends, and one of their friends who I had not met. We hiked in the hot sun, in the cold nights, camped by the river, and ate dehydrated food together. It was fun! The water, and the blue lived up to the expectations. The backpacking was strenuous (the hot sun didn’t help), but we prevailed. It felt great in the end! I was back in town, and hiked with Nim, in a more agreeable climate.  


Before we knew it, it was time for Canada! It was a road trip – Nim, two of our friends from here (the almost neighbors I mentioned earlier, and me). At the risk of sounding exaggerations at you, I’m going to say that it was one of the most breathtaking road trips I’ve ever been on, and I’ve road-tripped in the UK. The Canadian Rockies casually tower over all around you, across three or four national parks, Banff, Yoho, Jasper, and Glacier National Parks. Apart from driving through one of the most picturesque highways, we hiked. We hiked on glaciers, took pictures next to glacial lakes, even rode boats/canoes/kayaks on ice blue glacial lakes in the mountains. Canada served up unbelievable views of glaciers, greenery, mountain goats, waterfalls, and not to mention, amazing Indian food in a small town in a national park! Oh Canadaaa! I also felt closer to my friends on this trip, creating memories, united by experience. We had finally been to Canada, whose border was only a 100-minute drive from home! 

In the second week of July, my in-laws, who had never visited their daughter in her 6 years in the US, visited us in our home. I saw a lot of sides to Nimisha’s personality in preparation for this – the excitement, the nervousness, the happiness, etc., all of which made me think of the times when my family had visited me in the past. But this was slightly different. This was our home, and it would be the first time we were going to have family visit us. So, it was similar, but different. We had planned to have both families visit us together, and invited them together when we visited India in March. After much deliberation, my parents decided to not make the trip this time around, for a multitude of reasons; the main ones being not wanting to overwhelm us by forcing us to host 4-5 people instead of 2-3. But it was not an easy decision by any means. 
I saw Nimisha planning every week/weekend, trying to show my in-laws many things, and making their trip worth it. It was a familiar feeling. I enjoyed my time with them; the conversations, the outings, the trips to National Parks and skyscrapers alike. I had done this before, and I’d like to think that helped Nimisha navigate it. She showed her parents her Alma mater, and I saw their eyes beam in in pride. My eyes were too. My wife is pretty awesome. In fact, she was even invited by her professor to give a talk about her journey, her job, and her industry, to his current crop of students. A proud moment indeed. We also gave them a tour of our respective offices, and it was a good feeling, for everyone. 
A boat ride with my mother-in-law, margaritas with my father-in-law, were two of my personal highlights. Naturally, I was missing my parents (and sister) that extra bit during those 3 weeks, and I know they were feeling the same too. This feeling peaked when my in-laws helped us host our friends for an auspicious ceremony (Satyanarayana Pooje), to pray for the goodwill of the home, and its inmates, in various walks of life. I had them on video call for most parts of the pooje, and somewhere in the bottom of their hearts, I know, that they wished to have seen and visited their son and daughter-in-law’s residence along with their kid’s in-laws, if not earlier. I don’t want to harp on this any further, but my feelings have been conveyed, and understood. That’s what family does! They love, and hopefully understand. I can’t wait to have them over. 
My in-laws had a great time (I hope), and we did our best. 

After 3 weeks of being fed by your mother-in-law’s love, I had to play extra hard on the badminton court, hike an extra mile, and run on the treadmill (not a fan), to get back in shape for mine and Nimisha’s next commitment. Our next adventure; Mount Whitney (Sep 29). But, I was hit with Covid right after they left for India (Aug 12). It was a struggle – distancing, and making sure Nimisha doesn’t catch it. But we did it. 4 days later, I tested negative, and took another week to get back to a sense of normalcy – health wise. 

In the month leading up to Whitney, we had signed up for 3 concerts; Ed Sheeran, Coldplay, and Beyonce´ - They were all top notch! There was also Nimisha’s birthday in that time, for which I did my best to make her happy, and I think I did (I hope). We hiked, ate, danced to Taylor Swift’s songs with friends, among other things. 

Nimisha and I did our practice hikes, I even joined the gym for a month. I realized I can do things I don’t like for the sake of things I love. Hiking- love. Gym – don’t like. Oh Well. Nimisha however, loves both. It immensely helped to have a partner to prep. I had backpacked once before (you know it), and it would be Nimisha’s first time, and it would be Whitney! We helped each other prep in the areas we didn’t have experience in. Now, I could, and probably will, write a separate blog about our adventure to Mount Whitney, so this blog won’t go into the nitty gritty.

Finally, we, along with my friends from the Bay Area, summitted the tallest mountain in the contiguous United States – Mount Whitney. We realized the gravity of what we had achieved when we started getting congratulated by hikers we didn’t know! The adventure taught me a lot about me; how I react to physical hardships being the obvious one. It also taught me a lot about my fellow hikers, Nimisha, and my friends. We had forged a core memory together, another one created by experience – the best kind! 

Two weeks later, our friends in the Bay Area (same ones from Whitney, YNP) bought a new house, and threw a housewarming party for which we were invited along with our friends from here (remember Banff trip – we’re grad school buddies). We met with more friends of mine from various phases in my life, and like before, they hosted us for a full week after the party. We worked during the day in the week, and hung out during the evenings. We toured different parts of the city and the Bay Area on the weekend, and came back home. 

November was busy. We had an upcoming trip to India for my cousin’s wedding (cousin is technicality – brother is more accurate). We also had a 4-day trip to Tulum, Mexico, for our friends’ bachelor and bachelorette party. We enjoyed celebrating them, and also visiting resorts with beautiful white-sand beaches, and jumping into natural fresh water pools called cenote´s. 
Once we were back, we only had on weekend to shop before the India trip.

We did our holiday shopping, some gifts for our families (all the people we took out to celebrate our home), and before long, were in India! This trip was more a vacation (didn’t work from there really), and I was stoked about my brother’s wedding. I tried to be as involved as I could be. The wedding was in Pune, so the logistics between Bangalore and Pune had to be handled for all of us traveling. There were events pre-travel, and post travel, spreading the wedding festivities to a full week. It was a dream wedding for the couple, with every event being very #instagood, filled with happiness and laughter. 

Personally, this trip brought Nimisha closer to my extended family – my many first cousins who I’m really close to, and we were the wedding party! It was also the first time she was travelling with my parents, sister and me, as one family, to another event. It was important to me that everyone important and close to me, naturally liked each other (like one would), and I saw her bond with my oldest cousin who’s almost 45, and my other cousin’s 2-year-old. We all cheered, jeered, danced, laughed, drank, ate, traveled together, and that was the true essence of this trip for me, aside from the obvious happiness resulting from my brother getting married! 
We spent the remaining time (which wasn’t much) in India spending valuable time with our close family as usual, and returned to Bothell to tend to some home improvement, and work during the holidays :) 

It’s a wrap, 2023, Thank You! 

I traveled a bunch, learned a lot. Grew into my marriage, our new home, my job, learned a lot, climbed mountains, backpacked twice. All in all, a good year!  When I started writing this blog, I didn’t quite think it was going to shape up the way it did, but it helped me realize a few things as I wrote: 
  • Thankful for everything/everyone I love, and love me. 
  • I’m living my dream. I want to complain less about things I don’t have, and instead would want to work toward attaining it. 
And I’d want that to become my automatic resolution. 

Optimize for happiness. Fight with loved ones, so long as you resolve it before you sleep. Learn from those fights. Cherish what you have. 

Clearly, I’m getting old – I’ll be 30 in a month. Let’s go 2024!




PS: There were a couple of other events during the year that made a deep impact on my/our lives, but I’ve not included them to protect others’ privacy.

2023: A Memoir

Another December is on its way out, and along with it another year. T’is the season to recount, introspect, evaluate, and then of course, to...